It's funny when you reach a point in your life when you think you have it all figured out, you come to realize that all you thought you knew was actually backwards. As if you were looking at a picture upside down, and one day you flip it over and it makes much more sense, but it also means you have to "unlearn" what was already imprinted in your being.
You then modify your perceptions and your whole world comes tumbling down. A spark of self-doubt plants itself in a tiny nook between your heart and mind, like a parasite that just found its host. Everything you thought you knew comes into questioning, simple things, trivial things. You have internal battles, debates in your head between your acquired "truth" over the years and a "what if" scenario that would refute it.
Logic, reasoning, science, common sense; Your safe havens, that which you know to be true, or at least to a degree of certainty that surpasses your own convictions at the time. You find comfort in them, you appreciate their finiteness... Until you apply it to life.
Life is everything but. It's organic, flowing, chaotic, and doesn't make sense. It all comes down to the very essence that makes us human: We're flawed by nature. That which makes us different from the rest of the animal kingdom is also what may ultimately be our weakness.
This is best described by Descartes' "Cogito ergo sum" ("I think, therefore I am"), the realization of our existence ironically by the mere doubt of it. Free will, choice, alternative thinking, choosing the red pill instead of the blue, making a left turn instead of right... But I digress.
Doubt, which you thought presented itself all of the sudden, has actually always been there, dormant or active in some way. What one must realize (and has taken me many years to do so), is that without it we can't exist. There cannot be self-conviction without doubt, they are not opposing forces, but complementary. To embrace doubt and recognize its presence in your daily life is what makes you human.
"Small wins will get you through each day", my newest clichéd mantra. Having an overall perspective on things is a good thing, as long as you don't let it clutter your mind and distract you from what's in front of you. You either focus on the task at hand or subject yourself to the overwhelming feeling that everything is greater than your capabilities.
Self-conviction is also organic. It feeds on virtues you attain, experiences you learn from, the ability to stand up after falling down. But like anything organic, if you don't feed it, it will wither and die.
Feed your virtues, strive to be the best, keep your eyes on the goal. Mediocrity is the enemy of excellence, convince yourself beyond all doubt, that you can and will make it.
Yes... It's funny how doubt can be a positive thing. Motivates you to annihilate it, and in the process, you find yourself again. I am grateful for doubting myself from time to time. In quoting Plato, "I only know that I know nothing", a true humbling experience.
Small wins.
You then modify your perceptions and your whole world comes tumbling down. A spark of self-doubt plants itself in a tiny nook between your heart and mind, like a parasite that just found its host. Everything you thought you knew comes into questioning, simple things, trivial things. You have internal battles, debates in your head between your acquired "truth" over the years and a "what if" scenario that would refute it.
Logic, reasoning, science, common sense; Your safe havens, that which you know to be true, or at least to a degree of certainty that surpasses your own convictions at the time. You find comfort in them, you appreciate their finiteness... Until you apply it to life.
Life is everything but. It's organic, flowing, chaotic, and doesn't make sense. It all comes down to the very essence that makes us human: We're flawed by nature. That which makes us different from the rest of the animal kingdom is also what may ultimately be our weakness.
This is best described by Descartes' "Cogito ergo sum" ("I think, therefore I am"), the realization of our existence ironically by the mere doubt of it. Free will, choice, alternative thinking, choosing the red pill instead of the blue, making a left turn instead of right... But I digress.
Doubt, which you thought presented itself all of the sudden, has actually always been there, dormant or active in some way. What one must realize (and has taken me many years to do so), is that without it we can't exist. There cannot be self-conviction without doubt, they are not opposing forces, but complementary. To embrace doubt and recognize its presence in your daily life is what makes you human.
"Small wins will get you through each day", my newest clichéd mantra. Having an overall perspective on things is a good thing, as long as you don't let it clutter your mind and distract you from what's in front of you. You either focus on the task at hand or subject yourself to the overwhelming feeling that everything is greater than your capabilities.
Self-conviction is also organic. It feeds on virtues you attain, experiences you learn from, the ability to stand up after falling down. But like anything organic, if you don't feed it, it will wither and die.
Feed your virtues, strive to be the best, keep your eyes on the goal. Mediocrity is the enemy of excellence, convince yourself beyond all doubt, that you can and will make it.
Yes... It's funny how doubt can be a positive thing. Motivates you to annihilate it, and in the process, you find yourself again. I am grateful for doubting myself from time to time. In quoting Plato, "I only know that I know nothing", a true humbling experience.
Small wins.
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